Today when I asked my son to get something for me our of my room I had to catch myself because I almost said from Kerry (my ex boyfriend) side of the bed. I know that I have made many of mistakes in my walk with God and that I sometimes make things so much harder for myself by disobeying God. When my last relationship ended I had a very hard time getting over it. You see I am pretty hard headed and want to do things my way instead of the way God tells us to do. So instead of saving myself for my husband, and putting my trust in God, I put my trust in a man and was playing house. Even though I knew this was wrong I continued to do it because it felt good, and it helped ease my fear that I would be by myself for ever. Of course this eventually unraveled and instead of trying to do what I normally do and fix things according to what I think is right I went back to the only one I knew I could totally trust God!
Looking back on my past mistakes I see that I made numerous mistakes and made life harder on myself. I caused myself a lot of heartbreak and problems that could have been avoided if I had just listen to God and quit running. So, if you are wondering if I learned my lesson this time? Let me be the first to tell you that yes little old hard headed me has finally learned my lesson. I am working everyday to put my faith, and trust in God. I am also taking time away from relationships to work on myself and focus on rebuilding my relationship with God because I’ve learned in order for me to have a successful, healthy, God centered relationship with my mate, I need to make sure that my relationship with God is solid. By no means has this been easy, as a matter of fact I think the past few weeks may have been the hardest weeks of my life. But I can also state that I have never felt as much peace and happiness, as I have since I have chosen to give all my problems, worries, love, and heart to God. If anyone else is going through the same thing, or just need a friend to talk to, please leave me a comment or feel free to send me an email. Till next time.